2. I was dumped and I don't want to see him at work. : stressLess-life
I was dumped and I don't want to see him at work.
Roughly 10 months ago my ex-boyfriend (25M) broke up with me (23F), we had a relationship full of highs and lows. I sometimes felt belittled in the relationship, he felt exhausted and suffocated by me, and we ended it for good after 2.5 years together. That wasn't our first break up.
I have worked at a coffee shop for 7 years and still work there, in the past 10 months he has come in a few times with his family or friends, I never served them and let my coworkers take their orders instead. Most recently, he came in with a girl (24F) who we both know, and who followed me on Instagram when he started making post about me, when him and I were still in love with each other.
My boss said to me "hey, your ex and a girl are here waiting in line."
That morning, I was only there to get a coffee, but then I ended up helping my coworkers for a while because we had a really long line. When I confirmed that those two were in my workplace, I left and got on with my day elsewhere.
I tried to calm my breathing and deal with it, but it gave me full body shakes, a sick stomach, and made my legs feel like jello to see him in the one place that is my home away from home.
I avoid his workplace and social gatherings that I know he will be at, because I want to respect his choice to breakup with and cut ties with me. It seems that he doesn't have the same respect for me. I don't think its fair that he has the upperhand in how I feel in my own workplace, especially considering it sends me into a panic attack to see him. I don't force myself upon him where he makes his money, and I don't want to let him do that to me.
As much as I miss the good parts of us, and wish he would come back and choose me - I have begun to accept and really enjoy the distance from him. I don't ever want to see him again, because he mishandled my heart, and showed a great lack of care for my feelings. Now he's doing it again. I feel cornered, and on edge that he will come disrupt a good day when I'm just trying to work. I want to take back my power that I gave away, and make sure he can't hurt me or control my world anymore.
Would it be appropriate for me to set a boundary with him that he is not welcome into my work place?
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Roughly 10 months ago my ex-boyfriend (25M) broke up with me (23F), we had a relationship full of highs and lows. I sometimes felt belittled in the relationship, he felt exhausted and suffocated by me, and we ended it for good after 2.5 years together. That wasn't our first break up.
I have worked at a coffee shop for 7 years and still work there, in the past 10 months he has come in a few times with his family or friends, I never served them and let my coworkers take their orders instead. Most recently, he came in with a girl (24F) who we both know, and who followed me on Instagram when he started making post about me, when him and I were still in love with each other.
My boss said to me "hey, your ex and a girl are here waiting in line."
That morning, I was only there to get a coffee, but then I ended up helping my coworkers for a while because we had a really long line. When I confirmed that those two were in my workplace, I left and got on with my day elsewhere.
I tried to calm my breathing and deal with it, but it gave me full body shakes, a sick stomach, and made my legs feel like jello to see him in the one place that is my home away from home.
I avoid his workplace and social gatherings that I know he will be at, because I want to respect his choice to breakup with and cut ties with me. It seems that he doesn't have the same respect for me. I don't think its fair that he has the upperhand in how I feel in my own workplace, especially considering it sends me into a panic attack to see him. I don't force myself upon him where he makes his money, and I don't want to let him do that to me.
As much as I miss the good parts of us, and wish he would come back and choose me - I have begun to accept and really enjoy the distance from him. I don't ever want to see him again, because he mishandled my heart, and showed a great lack of care for my feelings. Now he's doing it again. I feel cornered, and on edge that he will come disrupt a good day when I'm just trying to work. I want to take back my power that I gave away, and make sure he can't hurt me or control my world anymore.
Would it be appropriate for me to set a boundary with him that he is not welcome into my work place?
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