2. this healing journey sucks and I need help to cope (advice) : stressLess-life

this healing journey sucks and I need help to cope (advice)

false

In 2023-2024, I faced a lot trauma which included betrayals from people who I thought were my friends,been ghosted by my best friend and lost alot of friendships. In addition to the struggles with my social life, I faced a lot of mental illness and financial burdens that seriously affected my academics. I was heavily suicidal in Nov 2024 and was hospitalized in the psych ward. Luckily, I got help and worked on my self through therapy and medications but I feel like I lost myself (mostly my motivation to do academically well). I don't know who i am anymore. I succeeded in my first year in 2023 and crumpled dismally in 2024 in my second year.

I have been accepted to an online university and I had not had any luck in forming friendships in 2025, but I feel anxious about the future and what I will become this year.

I have been struggling with another problem. So a few months ago I posted my traumatic experience with a person who harshly rejected me and didn't give me any sort of closure which led to me questioning what I did to him to make him act that way. He was nice to me before the incident happened. This happened in April 2024. So I took entire year to heal (due to financial and mental health issues) , however I have been getting memories of him which restarts the whole limerence cycle . I have this anger I have towards him because I didnt like being treated with such disrespect. I blocked him on all my social medias but I still can't get rid of him in my mind. What's more depressing is my healing journey was actually rough.

I have consulted my therapist about this and he could not understand what limerence was. To say limerence is just an obsession is an understatement and he is quite an old therapist. So I didn't really have the support to cope with this. Other than dealing with the problems of my life, my romantic life has not been good either. I havent gotten any luck in love (been rejected and had people not being interested in me) and came to the conclusion that I will never find someone who loves me no matter how much self-love and healing I do. Ruminating about these issues makes me think about him more which really sucks

I just want to be free to live my own life and focus on myself.

submitted by /u/forestviolette
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