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2. Update it does get better : stressLess-life

Update it does get better

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Hi Ive been here for a while, i honestly don’t use reddit like i used to But i would like to share some stuff here that made me feel better I went to therapy, i was scared because my last therapist was shitty and actually made me feel worse, but my new therapist? Oh gosh wow She actually tells me what i need to here rather than what i want to feel, when you realise sometimes you’re wrong it kinda gives you so much control, yea i may have fucked up but it i can fix it the same way i ruined it I started to get out of the house Yes i lost most of my money on uber lol But i also was so HAPPY I think getting new friends and leaving the house does WONDERS I had a new friend in uni, she’s childlike, brings me happiness and our little group? We celebrate every little thing, that makes me so happy, every studying session feels so good because i at least get to spend time with my friends, im even better academically because of that Because for once i feel in control of my life and my body, i started wearing makeup again, having my own thoughts and looking at people in the eye Im trying to not be super mean to myself, ye its hard but theres progress I made somewhat of a life for me Its peaceful, little, on budget But it makes me happy I got a ps5 and omg lemme tell you it was the best thing ever, i only play overwatch lol but i spend all my days playing it with my friend:. I have 111 hours even tho i started playing two months ago lol I started painting again and decorating my room, i started to feel human again, i started to feel more independent on myself for once For once, i feel like im normal, i dont have to fix anything because theres nothing inherently wrong with me personally
I have some new hobbies.. like making coffee? Playing sodoku? I was in dark place, i was crying every day, hating myself, c*tting myself, genuinely feels so bad abd self destructing my own life and relationships It does get better Maybe you just needed to leave the house

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