2. Recommendations for Dealing With Sexual Shame? : stressLess-life

Recommendations for Dealing With Sexual Shame?

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I, M (Mid-20s), have been doing a lot of self-reflection recently about my hangups with sex and the extreme shame I've felt about it. I think the catalyst for this was last year when I had a "friend" who ended up sexually harrassing my partner, M (Mid-20s), and I, probing a lot into our sex life, and generally being a sex pest. She's no longer in our lives, but I've been feeling a lot of shame in my sexuality since. I just want to love myself and treat myself with compassion. I can be very cruel to myself.

I try to be sex positive but I feel gross for having kinks, I feel like I don't perform well in bed, I feel gross for being fat, and I think a lot of it just goes back to poor self esteem and poor self image.

I've been in a monogamous relationship for most of my adult life, and my partner and I generally have great communication and we've been talking about this issue, but the extent of it is something I've only realised recently. I've been wanting to get therapy but unfortunately therapy isn't an option right now. I got denied by insurance. Does anyone have any advice or sources (books, sites, authors, academics, etc) with good resources on this?

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