2. It's silly, but universe is having my back : stressLess-life

It's silly, but universe is having my back

false

After a long time, years, the person I wanted the most in my life choose to walk away. In a really cold way as well, I was told to leave him alone and forget he exists, and he ignored all the rest of my messages, voicemails, everything.

I have BPD, and it's been insanely hard. I kept checking his online stuff, so many times a day, kept sending him stupid messages that were ignored, kept on hoping he changes his mind

Yesterday, I was feeling so horrible at work, I didn't know what to do, where to hide, just wanted to scream my heart out and stop existing. But I decided to choose myself, I googled some books about letting go, bought one on my phone and started reading it during my break time

I work in a recycling center, where people donate stuff, we only collect clothing and everything else gets thrown away unfortunately. Anyway, I come back to work, 5 minutes into working, I find a book called " getting past your breakup ", and it might be one hell of a coincidence, but it truly felt like universe is looking after me. In a million different books there could have been, it was exactly that one. Shortly, in fact 10 minutes after I decided to break my bad habits of begging and checking on him, and choose to read something on my own about letting him go

I took the book home and read it before bed, and it's been already helping me in such a big way. And I might be silly, but I truly feel cared for, I don't feel so alone anymore, I feel like some higher power is there to help me if only I start choosing myself

So I'll continue to trust that, and work on loving myself each and every day!

Thanks for reading my silly little happy achievement 😊💁‍♀️

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