2. Need some advice — how to know what answer is intuitive : stressLess-life

Need some advice — how to know what answer is intuitive

false

My birthday is this Friday and I’m so torn of what to do for it — stay with friends or visit family back home. I don’t want to be disappointed.

I’m having a really hard time knowing which answer is my intuition vs ego

For background: I moved away from home about 2 years ago and love where I live but it’s been very hard to make true genuine friendships here. I feel like I am constantly reaching out and putting in the effort (but I also know that’s kind of how it goes when you’re the new one).

But yeah inside sometimes I feel deeply lonely even though I know a have made 2-3 really genuine friends here but it still seems I always have to be the one to set plans. I don’t think this is a “choose better friends” problem either — I think people just grow older and are selfish and busy.

I told my friends my birthday was this week and everyone is down to do something which is cool as there’s so much i’ve been dying to do in this town since I got here.

So I am in love with the possibilities of what we could do — a cute dinner, bonefire, etc. but then again I never really do any of those things with my friends and we basically always have access to them now.

And then I know I could just fly home (8 hour flight) and see my family who I dearly miss. I know I’d want to grill with them and I know I would feel special for the day but the thing is, there really isn’t anything to do in my hometown and for the price of the flight, it’s not worth it to go just a few days. I also have to fly back home in December anyways.

On top of all this, I’m dealing with trying to find a new apartment and have been doing showings in person and am worried if I leave now or have the opportunity to move sooner, I’ll miss something good.

I’m going back and forth between now deciding if this place is even right for me anymore to live. My head is just filled with a bunch of noise so it could be good to get away for a bit and see my fam, but I would still come back to the same problem with housing and potentially be more stressed.

What would you do? I know it might sound silly but I just feel that I’m let down a lot by my friends but also don’t want to act out of fear / comfortability and go home because I know that outcome.

If I stay here I could definitely have a good birthday / week too, I just want others to show up for me for once.

How do you know which choice is your intuition vs your ego or head speaking?

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