2. I (27F) feel like I do nothing right in my relationship. : stressLess-life

I (27F) feel like I do nothing right in my relationship.

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My boyfriend is sleeping in his bedroom and he put my pillow and blanket back in my room. I went out to see my favorite band and he didn’t respect the time I wanted to leave. IT’S MY FAVORITE BAND? Why am I accommodating to him? Why does he not care enough to be ready when I want to go? Why am I always the villain??????????? I’m SO MAD. Reasons keep being made why I can’t have his affection, time, communication, anything!!! I keep being told I’m “mother” or “princess” in the negative sense. Why can’t I just be OKAY???? I’m so mad and I don’t know how to feel understood. I’m so frustrated and all I wanted was to prioritize my experience because last time, I didn’t get a good spot and was behind a tree the whole time. I didn’t enjoy it and wanted to cry. This time, I got a GREAT spot and sang to practically every song and made a friend. But I come home and not even my roommate want to deal with me. I’m in a perpetual state of being wrong and it’s miserable and it’s lonely and it’s suffocating. I just want to okay.

What am I doing wrong and how do I improve????

Yes I’m seeing a therapist and taking meds. Yes I read so much self help and listen to podcasts. Yes, I’m trying to journal and do gratitudes. Yes, I’m attending support group meetings. Yes, I’m trying to not put all my eggs in one basket and spend time with my friends. Yes, I’m trying to be more independent and do solo things too. Yes, I go to the gym to try and blow steam. I’m trying and it feels like nothing ever works. I just want to be okay.

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