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2. I take care of myself like I would take care of people I love : stressLess-life

I take care of myself like I would take care of people I love

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I always had a problem with self-love. I have been caring about others more than about me.

  • I'm hungry? I'll eat a fast sandwich. My sister is hungry? I'll make the best dinner for her.

  • I'm tired? Well, I need to work harder. My boyfriend is tired? "Take rest baby."

  • I want a new dress? It's too expensive. My sister wants a new one? I'll give her a gift.

  • My apartment is dirty? I don't care, I won't have any guests. My friends are visiting? I'll clean for them to make them feel good.

These situations don't sound good, right? During my childhood I wasn't asked too often what I want. My parents focused on things that they thought they should give me. I felt unheard and needed to bury my needs. Giving others too much obviously made me feel used. What opened my eyes was meeting a guy with depression. He was a very negative person and didn't care too much about me, but I was so sorry for him, I wanted to help him. Then I realized that I just ended my depression and why I wasn't so caring for myself?

It took me almost 30 years to realize that, but I'm proud of my progress. What I'm doing is talking to myself and taking care of me as I would take care of my sister or my boyfriend.

  • I want a good breakfast.
  • But I'm too lazy to make it.
  • Would you make it for your sister.
  • Yes, sure. She would get anything she wants.
  • So make a breakfast for me.
  • But I'm lazy. I would like to have a boyfriend that would make me breakfasts.
  • But you can just do it for me! You don't need a boyfriend to get a fun breakfast.
  • Okay, you're right. I'll make myself the best breakfast I can.

  • Thank for you a great breakfast. Now I'll have a good start of the day.

  • You're welcome, I'm happy that I could make you happy.

I know it may sound crazy, but it made me feel loved. I'm just in the beginning of this journey, but I'm glad I'm finally ready to work on that.

What are your methods to work on self-love?

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