2. How minimalism helped me build self-worth : stressLess-life

How minimalism helped me build self-worth

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Recently, I had a conversation with a friend who asked me about my motivation for becoming a life coach. Reflecting on my personal journey, I traced it back to a transformative period six years ago when I faced profound losses that prompted deep introspection and inner work. At the time, a dear friend offered a poignant insight that has since resonated with me: my own struggles were preparing me to assist others in navigating similar challenges. Today, I am grateful to have finally pursued my calling.

The friend also inquired about the primary reason behind my life falling apart during that time. Although I believed that various issues hindered my progress, if I had to select one, it would be low self-esteem and self-worth. Over the years, I dedicated myself to rebuilding and discovered different strategies that were helpful. However, if I had to choose the most impactful one, it would undoubtedly be practicing minimalism.

Minimalism marked the starting point of my journey to self-reconstruction. It all began when I was inspired by the book "The Life-Changing Magic of Tidying Up." Decluttering my physical space became synonymous with decluttering my mind and spirit. I experienced an immense sense of relief as I let go of possessions that no longer served me. It was during this process that I first glimpsed my heart and connected with my intrinsic worth, independent of external factors. Interestingly, the more I released, the more internal joy I experienced. In the past, I always felt an empty void within me, and no matter how much I shopped or pursued achievements, the resulting happiness was fleeting. I was constantly chasing the next thing to fill that void. However, once I began to let go, I entered a state where I no longer needed anything external. I discovered a wholeness within my heart, just as it was.

Many people ask me how to build self-worth. My answer is that you must first let go before rebuilding, allowing your heart to become clear. This involves letting go of distractions, negative experiences, and people who no longer contribute to your growth. Once you have released these burdens, you enter a clean state that serves as a solid foundation for building self-worth. Starting anew requires great courage. It is natural for us to develop emotional attachments to past experiences, both positive and negative. Often, the thought of letting go evokes fear, loneliness, and grief. It is crucial to acknowledge these emotions and express gratitude for their presence, as they are attempting to protect you. Eventually, you must release them.

For me, minimalism does not involve relinquishing everything. Rather, it entails making conscious choices about what to let go of and what to keep. It is a decision-making process where you retain items that bring you joy while discarding anything that no longer serves a purpose. Upon completing this process, you will feel lighter and develop a more positive outlook on yourself. This newfound confidence sets the stage for building self-worth and embracing new experiences and connections that genuinely align with your authentic self.

Our external environment often mirrors our inner state. Thus, the initial step towards letting go involves decluttering your physical space and eliminating items that no longer serve you. As mentioned earlier, this may not always be easy, as it can evoke a range of emotions. Validate these feelings and respond to them with kindness and gratitude. Then, reflect on the memories associated with each item. Do they evoke positivity or negativity? Do they contribute to your self-esteem? If the answer is affirmative, keep the item; if not, let it go. Even if your response is neutral, it is still necessary to release it, as anything other than a resounding "yes" is essentially a "no." This tip is especially useful for those who struggle with indecisiveness and find it challenging to make choices.

Once you have let go, acknowledge your courage and celebrate your fresh start. Check-in with yourself and take note of your current emotions. Do you feel relief, regret, worry, or fear? All of these emotions are valid and can arise during this process. However, it is important not to be too hard on yourself if you experience negative emotions. Sometimes, we may make the wrong decisions regarding what to release, and that's okay. Anything you let go of will come back to you in a different form if it is truly meant to be in your life.

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