2. I overcame my social anxiety in 4 years, I want to give you 3 great tips how you can do the same: : stressLess-life

I overcame my social anxiety in 4 years, I want to give you 3 great tips how you can do the same:

https://ift.tt/7NRSaBy

Since I was 6 years old I've struggled massively with social situations. I've been bullied in school and for 4 years waking up and going there was my biggest nightmare. Not only would they be extremely mean to me verbally but they would also beat me up regularly. Because of that I started to hate people, I would avoid them at all cost when in reality, deep deep inside what I desired the most was this feeling of true connection and love for the people around me. So with 19 I finally decided that I need to change and I swore to myself that I'll find true love and happiness and that I will overcome my social anxiety.

4 years later I am so grateful that I am now able to live a wonderful life full with people who love me for who I am, who support me through everything, who stand beside me when it's getting difficult. The situation I am in right now is something that I would have never believed to be possible for someone like me, but yet I am living it. This all was no luck, I had to look deep inside me and work hard on myself. But it was worth it and I learned so much about myself and life. For sure it's impossible to break everything down in 1 single post but I want to give you 3 points that helped me so much to turn my life around and to overcome my social anxiety:

#1 There is no way around feeling it.

The thing is: We are all afraid of things. But the clue is that we are not only afraid of situations, but more than anything we are afraid of the feelings that come with the situations. In a nutshell we are afraid of being afraid. We are afraid of the sweaty hands, we are afraid of the fast beating heart, we are afraid of the 1000 racing thoughts in our head when we see someone on the streets that we find attractive. But how do we break this circle now? By teaching our body that it is ok to feel everything. By accepting that we are scared to death right now and by giving ourselves the allowance to let it be. I know this sounds frightening and counter intuitive but trust me, when you are not afraid of being afraid anymore you'll have a significantly easier time with social anxiety.

#2 Get rejected over and over again

Let's be honest. What is it that we are really afraid of? That we get rejected, that the person we so courageously approached sees us as weird, dumb, ugly, unlovable, boring, you name it. I hate to bring you the real talk here but: You will get rejected. Ones you decide (and it is a decision) to break out of your circle and talk to more people you will get rejected many many times. I know how scary it sounds but you SHOULD WANT TO GET REJECTED. Because then you learn that it doesn't matter what people think about you. Your life will go on no matter how hard you will get judged. And in the end what's more painful: A life where your anxieties determined your life, or a life where you might get rejected but a life where you know that you looked your fears in the eyes and you did it anyways!

#3 Travel to the root of your social anxiety

I know anxiety can seem like a monster that we can't overcome. Something that has it's tight grips around us and doesn't let us go no matter how hard we try. But you know what? The anxiety wants to help you. It want's to help you so that you don't hurt yourself again. Because in the past you've been hurt by other people, that's why you are so afraid of them now. You don't want that to happen again. So by seeing our anxiety as a friend that wants to help us we can understand it better. We can find out the real cause of why we are truly anxious. To do this by your own is a bit difficult as the root is often buried deep in our subconscious. That's why I would definitely recommend working together with a hypnotherapist, a coach, a speech therapist or whatever sounds most appealing to you. But key is that you get to know what you are afraid of. Then your anxiety doesn't seem like this monster anymore and it is so much easier to overcome it.

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