2. Self-loathing ruining the best relationship I’ve ever had : stressLess-life

Self-loathing ruining the best relationship I’ve ever had

https://ift.tt/d9Wbskw

I (24F) and my partner (24M) have been together for just over a year, but were really close friends for 5 years before that. We currently live together and are about to move into a new home together, and we are very much settled down at this point.

I have always had deep struggles with mental illness, I grew up in an abusive home and have no relationship with my dad (and a lacklustre relationship with my mum and brother). I have been in therapy for most of my life, however recently as I’ve been striving to make progress I have realised that majority of my problems boil down to the deep hatred I feel towards myself.

Currently in my relationship, I am unable to trust that my partner won’t abuse me and I am essentially constantly on the look out for red flags or warning signs that he’s treating me poorly, and when I find one I come down on him like a tone of bricks. In the moment I feel so justified, but sometimes I can really upset him and I know he feels like he’s walking on eggshells.

I know he deserves better than this, and that makes me hate myself so much more. I am unable to trust that he won’t abuse me because my self esteem is so low and history has taught me it’s a certainty, but then my defence mechanism to try and nip it in the bud makes me hate myself even more because he deserves so much better than that.

I really need to learn how to love myself and believe that my partner is with me because he loves me and does not have any malicious intent to hurt me down the line. Any ideas on where I can start are greatly appreciated.

submitted by /u/tthrow_it_away
[link] [comments]








Related links


I want to know the mind and emotions of a man towa. I want to understand what he is thinking and feeling at any given time. I want to know what makes him happy and what makes him sad. I want to know what he fears and what motivates him. I want to know his hopes and dreams. I want to know everything about him.


Addiction Is Messy, But These Things Help Me Stay Clean


5 Ways to Use Movement (Not Exercise) to Support Your Mental Health


My Second Mother: When Someone Steps Up Like Family Never Did


just sitting silently


How to Release the Fear That Holds You Back and Keeps You Small


What Happiness Means and How I’m Boosting My Day-to-Day Joy


why am i always in one-sided relationships


Psychological behaviour of husband with his wife who failed in love before marriage


What makes you dislike yourself?


When You’re Ready for Change: You Need to Believe in Your Future Self


4 Anxiety-Calming Techniques I Wish I Used When I Freaked Out on a Plane


What type of doctors experience the most stress?


Why is it significant to overcome stress?


How I Stopped Chasing Men Who Hurt Me and Found Healthy Love : #stressless


Stay Comfortable


I have irrational thoughts that she’s better than me


Skills That You Can Learn From (A2) Trying Harder Isn\\\'t Always The Answer:stressLess-life.


How do we know what we want in our lives?


5 Simple Yet Essential Self Care Tips That Can Change Your Life


#2 . How do I stop putting my worth based on how men see me? : stressLess-life


Self love challenge - looking for a group to join!


People-Pleasers Are Liars: 3 Things We Gain When We’re Honest Instead


How to Deal With Low Moods: A 4-Step Plan to Help You Feel Better


One words to define love story Hater





does depression affect sperm quality


What is the difference between stress and emotions? The WHO has defined them as two different life skills and I am not able to make a difference.


What are some signs that show a lack of confidence in a person's speech or behavior?


Is it good to live hubby without love or marry to BF?


growing up as the only black member of a white family movie


separation anxiety mother symptoms


why self-love and self-care is important


I am very sad every day. I have decided not to live. What should I do?


why am i losing interest in things i used to love


never waste your feelings on someone who doesn't value your emotions meaning in hindi


I am very sad every day. I have decided not to live. What should I do?


Why is it significant to overcome stress?

Can-I-reduce-my-stress?

https://stressless-2021.blogspot.com/2022/06/reduce-my-stress.html

Getting Out Of A Slump

Me Exercising/dancing to Unbelievable by EMF. Not too great, but started doing this at 57 yrs......truly my inner child is coming out to play!:stressLess-life

Abandonment Issues



Increasing and practicing self worth and self love:stressLess-life

(A2) LIFE AND LOVE???:stressLess-life

Neon Genesis Evangelion and validating ones own existence:stressLess-life

Calmed myself down with loving energy.:stressLess-life

"Why do you forgive everyone but yourself?”:stressLess-life

How to accept belly fat?:stressLess-life



admiring myself all 2022 ??:stressLess-life



Self love feels so lonely:stressLess-life



Increasing and practicing self worth and self love:stressLess-life

(A2) LIFE AND LOVE???:stressLess-life

Neon Genesis Evangelion and validating ones own existence:stressLess-life

Calmed myself down with loving energy.:stressLess-life

"Why do you forgive everyone but yourself?”:stressLess-life

How to accept belly fat?:stressLess-life



admiring myself all 2022 ??:stressLess-life



Self love feels so lonely:stressLess-life









😄 " Forget the past; look forward to the future, for the best things are yet to come. ..... "